08.03.2026

For the first day it could have gone a lot worse. Didn’t buy anything so yay there. Went for my 40 minute walk which I did at a stupid time of day – freaking high noon. Beyond that it was a good day. I had two beers, which in my eye counts for nothing other than empty calories. I am trying to cut back the hard stuff for a while.

08.04.2026

The walk was a walk. I wore a baseball cap today which defiantly helped. Although I should probably look into sun screen and a bucket hat for the future. 40 minutes from front door and back isnt a terrible pace – I think? – and with a 5 minute per walk around the track its not terrible. However a 20 minute mile is rather pathetic.

08.05.2026

I don’t care. I haven’t had any fast food all week, I am having a gin and tonic. Apparently that and vodka sodas are the lowest calorie drinks so bite me. Also today was not exactly the best day, dealing with generative AI slob taking over my side hustle in real time was not exactly fun to deal with. Nor explain to someone who doesn’t have time to understand in depth what I do. Which I design shirts, its not that difficult, however that not the point. As an artist with integrity and morale, I will never use AI art work and be a bitch about it. I don’t care if they’re a paying client, they can use google apparently and just do my job without me. Why bother me in the first place!?

08.06.2026

Well I am not sure if this is going in any better direction or not. Since the whole ai nonsense from yesterday, I haven’t felt exactly great. I mean I havent felt right to begin with, but yep. The ONLY good thing that has happened this week is the fact I haven’t had any fast food, which has been a goal of mine for a while. Also along with limiting my spending. Books however will for ever be my kryptonite. I have no idea to feel. Like I always felt disconnected from the world. The best way I can describe it is, I am just a pair of floating eyeballs, no body, no will to be alive, no control over anything I do because I’ve just kept choosing the wrong choice, etc. Sigh, but thats for another post, or to file away under the never ending pile under that rug somewhere in the corner of the mind.

08.07.2025

Well I knew that full work days would throw everything out the window. I guess the only thing that really changed this week was the whole no fast food. So I was rather proud of that. Until after work where I scarfed down an entire cup bop bowl and a k-dawg in thirty minutes. Sigh. And then getting the vodka was – just a poor choice. So over all I did like three ish days of actual challenge accomplishments, and the two other days just fell off the cliff with a ‘told you so’ sign. Basically I have to find the main highlights of this week and focus on that. I liked the sleep I got when I went to bed sober. I liked that I had energy to cook food – I ate a sweet potato!? Yes, yes don’t get too emotional. The walks could have been better just because of the heat. Although one of the walks was at work, walking the entire store looking for stickers ((which I could not find)) but it took the hour so I am counting that. So I got three out of the four works outs this week.

08.08.2026

I needed a change of scenery and drove myself to the next city over and went book shopping. The closest Barnes and Nobel is an hour away and I don’t go there very often, so I tend to splurge. And when I splurge its like 4 books and Starbucks. I also went to target but didn’t see anything really eye catching there. I can’t really shop for cloths at any of those places because they never had anything in my size. And that could be one of the reasons why I started this whole thing, to be able to fit and feel good in trendy cute cloths. But alas, week one is over and I only did three forty minute work outs, no fast food, and still drunk as a skunk on the weekends. Which I pretty much knew would happen.

08.09.2026

Well its over, week one and honestly it started out good, but as predicted, the weekend came and I feel off the wagon. The only praise I will give myself is the diet part. I didn’t go out after work for breakfast, I made random meals at home that turned out okay ish, and i drank my water. Now I didn’t get to the full 64 ounces of water every day, I seem to be rounding out at 40 ish ounces. Which is still something I think. The works outs did not go anywhere. And now with work giving me more hours, I don’t know how often I will do those 45 minute work outs. I have no idea how people with a full time job can go to do workouts after an 8 hour shift.

REVIEW

So this week was over all okay. There are plenty of areas for improvement, naturally. But it did make me learn that I have some discipline, ie the fast food. The other habits I have to work on will come with time. Its just encouraging that I was successful in the clean diet. Now for the sober bit, yeah at least it was just vodka and sodas, supposedly the lighter calorie of drinks. But regardless I slept better and wake up easier when I go to bed without a drink. So it should be an easy fix right!? Fuck, if any of you know what addictions are like, it ain’t that easy. I just – dont know what to do about it. I kind of know my triggers but I don’t the best approach to fixing it – other than never have cash on me to avoid going out to begin with. Yay!?